The Caesars
A Satire by the Emperor Julian, circa 361 CE
Web Publication by Mountain Man Graphics, Australia

THE CAESARS

[Editor's Note: The season of the Kronia, or the latin Saturnalia is a Roman winter solstice festival, dedicated to Saturn, commencing on 17 December and celebrated for a whole week, up to 23 December. It was traditional that the master-slave role (or equivalent) was reversed, gifts exchanged, etc, and symbolised by the preparation of a meal by the masters, for the slaves. The use of green trees was a common custom and adornment.

In any other words, the festival got hijacked by Constantine c.325 CE, just after he had hijacked Sunday in 321 CE, to become what is known today as "christmas". In the Roman calendar, the Saturnalia was designated a holy day, or holiday, on which religious rites were performed. Saturn, himself, was identified with Kronos, and sacrificed to according to Greek ritual, with the head uncovered. The Temple of Saturn, the oldest temple recorded by the pontiffs, had been dedicated on the Saturnalia, and the woolen bonds which fettered the feet of the ivory cult statue within were loosened on that day to symbolize the liberation of the god. --- For further information see Macrobius.]




"It is the season of the Kronia, [1] during which the
god allows us to make merry. But, my dear friend, 
as I have no talent for amusing or entertaining I
must methinks take pains not to talk mere nonsense."

"But, Caesar, can there be anyone so dull and
stupid as to take pains over jesting? I always
thought that such pleasantries were a relaxation of
the mind and a relief from pains and cares."

"Yes, and no doubt your view is correct, but that
is not how the matter strikes me. For by nature I
have no turn for raillery, or parody, or raising a
laugh. But since I must obey the ordinance of the 
god of the festival, should you like me to relate to
you by way of entertainment a myth in which there
is perhaps much worth hearing?"

"I shall listen with great pleasure, for I too am not
one to despise myths, and I am far from rejecting
those that have the right tendency; indeed I am of
the same opinion as you and your admired, or rather
the universally admired, Plato. He also often
conveyed a serious lesson in his myths."

"By Zeus, that is true indeed!"

"But what is your myth and of what type?"

"Not one of those old-fashioned ones such as
Aesop [2] wrote. But whether you should call mine an
invention of Hermes - for it was from him I learned
what I am going to tell you - or whether it is really
true or a mixture of truth and fiction, the upshot,
as the saying is, will decide."

"This is indeed a fine preface that you have
composed, just the thing for a myth, not to say an
ovation! But now pray tell me the tale itself,
whatever its type may be."


"Attend"


At the festival of the Kronia Romulus gave a
banquet, and invited not only all the gods, but the
Emperors as well. For the gods couches had been
prepared on high, at the very apex, so to speak, of
the sky, [3] on "Olympus where they say is the seat of
the gods, unshaken forever". [4] For we are told
that after Heracles, Quirinus also ascended thither,
since we must give Romulus the name of Quirinus
in obedience to the divine will. [5] For the gods
then the banquet had been made ready there. 
But just below the moon in the upper air he had
decided to entertain the Emperors. The lightness
of the bodies with which they had been invested,
and also the revolution of the moon sustained
them. Four couches were there made ready
for the superior gods. That of Kronos was made
of gleaming ebony, which concealed in its blackness
a lustre so intense and divine that no one
could endure to gaze thereon. For in looking at
that ebony, the eyes suffered as much, methinks,
from its excess of radiance as from the sun when
one gazes too intently at his disc. The couch of
Zeus was more brillian than silver, but paler than
gold; whether however one ought to call this
"electron", [6] or to give it some other name, Hermes
could not inform me precisely. On either side of
these sat on golden thrones the mother and daughter,
Hera beside Zeus and Rhea beside Kronos. As for the
beauty of the gods, not even Hermes tried to describe
it in his tale; he said that it transcended description,
and must be comprehended by the eye of the mind;
for in words it was hard to portray and
impossible to convey to mortal ears. Never indeed
will there be or appear an orator so gifted that he
could describe such surpassing beauty as shines
forth on the countenance of the gods.

For the other gods had been prepared a throne or
couch, for everyone according to his seniority. Nor did
any dispute arise as to this, but Homer said, [7] and
correctly, no doubt instructed by the Muses themselves,
every god has his seat on which it is irrevocably
ordained that he shall sit, firmly and immovably
fixed; and though they rise on the entrance of
their father they never confounded or changed the order
of their seats or infringe on one another's, since
every one knows his appointed place.

Now when the gods were seated in a circle,
Silenus, amorous, methinks, of Dionysus ever fair and
ever young, who sat close to Zeus his father, took
his seat next to him on the pretext that he had
brought him up and was his tutor. And since
Dionysus loves jesting and laughter and is the giver
of the Graces, Silenus diverted the god with a
continual flow of sarcasms and jests, and in other
ways besides.


[01: Julius Caesar ]

When the banquet had been arranged for the
Emperors also, Julius Caesar entered first, and such
was his passion for glory that he seemed ready to
contend with Zeus himself for dominion. Whereupon
Silenusobserving him said, "Take care, Zeus,
lest this man in his lust for power be minded to
rob you of your empire. He is, as you see, tall and
handsome, and if he resembles me in nothing else,
round about his head he is very like me." [8] 


[02: Octavian ]

While Silenus, to whom the gods paid very little attention,
was jesting thus, Octavian entered, changing colour
continually, like a chameleon, turning now pale now
red,; one moment his expression was gloomy, sombre,
and overcast, the next he unbent and showed all the
charms of Aphrodite and the Graces. Moreover in
the glances of his eyes he was fain to resemble
mighty Helios, for he preferred that none who
approached should be able to meet his gaze. [9]

"Good Heavens!" exclaimed Silenus, "what a changeable
monster is this! What mischief will he do us?"

"Cease trifling", said Apollo, "after I have handed
him over to Zeno [10] here, I shall transform him for you
straightway to gold without alloy. Come, Zeno" he
cried, "take charge of my nursling". Zeno obeyed,
and thereupon, by reciting over Octavian a few of his
doctrines, [11] in the fashion of those who mutter the
incantations of Zamolxis, [12] he made him wise and
temperate.

[03: Tiberius ]

The third to hasten in was Tiberius, with countenance
solemn and grim, and an expression at once sober
and martial. But as he turned to sit down
his back was seen to be covered with countless
scars, burns, and sores, painful welts and bruises,
while ulcers and abscesses were as though branded
thereon, the result of his self-indulgent and
cruel life. [13]. 

Whereupon Silenus cried out, "Far different, 
friend, thou appearest now than before", [14] and
seemed more serious than he had wont. 

"Pray,why so solemn, little father?" said Dionysus. "It
was this old satyr", he replied, "he shocked me and
made me forget myself and introduce Homer's
Muse." "Take care", said Dionysus, "he will pull
your car, as he is said to have done to a certain
grammarian." [15] 

"Plague take him", said Silenus, "in his little island"
 - he was alluding to Capri - "let him scratch the face
of that wretched fisherman". [16].


[04: Caligula ]

While they were still joking together, there came
a fierce monster. [17] Thereupon all the gods turned
away their eyes from the sight, and next moment
Justice handed him over to the Avengers who
hurled him into Tartarus.  So Silenus had no chance
to say anything about him.


[05: Claudius ]

But when Claudius came in Silenus 
began to sing some verses from the
Knights of Aristophanes, [18] toadying Claudius, as it
seemed, instead of Demos. The he looked at Quirinus
and said, "Quirinus, it is not kind of you to invite
your descendant to a banquet without his freedmen
Narcissus and Pallas. [19] Come", he went on, "send
and fetch them, and please send too for his spouse
Messalina, for without them this fellow is like a
lay-figure in a tragedy, I might almost say lifeless." [20]


[06: Nero ]

While Silenus was speaking Nero entered, lyre in
hand and wearing a wreath of laurel. Whereupon
Silenus turned to Apollo and said "You see he
models himself on you." 

"I will soon take off that wreath", replied Apollo,
"for he does not imitate me in all things, and even
when he does he does it badly." Then his wreath was
taken off and Cocytus instantly swept him away.



[07: Vindex ]
[08: Galba ]
[09: Otho ]
[10: Vitellius ]
[11: Vespasian ]
[12: Titus ]
[13: Domitan ]


After Nero many Emperors of many sorts came
crowding in together, Vindex, Galba, Otho, Vitellius,
so that Silenus exclaimed, "Where, ye gods, have ye
found such a swarm of monarchs? We are bing
suffocated with their smoke; for brutes of this sort
spare not even the temple of the gods." [21] 

The Zeus turned to his brother Serapis, and pointing to
Vespasian said, "Send this niggard from Egypt forthwith
to extinguish the flames.  As for his sons, bid the
eldest [22] sport with Aphrodite Pandemos and chain the
younger [23] in the stocks like the Sicilian monster." [24]


[14: Nerva ]


Next entered an old man, [25] beautiful to behold; for
even old age can be radiantly beautiful.  Very mild
were his manners, most just his dealings.  In Silenus
he inspired such awe that he fell silent. 

"What!" said Hermes, "have you nothing to say to us 
about this man?"

"Yes, by Zeus," he replied, "I blame you gods for your
unfairness in allowing that blood-thirsty monster to
rule for fifteen years, while you granted this man
scarce one whole year."

"Nay", said Zeus, "do not blame us.  For I will bring
in many vitruous princes to succeed him."  

[15: Trajan ]

Accordingly Trajan entered forthwith, carrying on his shoulders the
trophies of his wars with the Getae and the Parthians.
Silenus, when he saw him, said in a whisper which he
meant to be heard, "Now is the time for Zeus our master
to look out, if he wants to keep Ganymede for himself."

[16: Hadrian ]

Next entered an austere-looking man [26] with a long
beard, an adept in all the arts, but especially music,
one who was always gazing at the heavens and prying
into hidden things.  Silenus when he saw him said,

"What think ye of this sophist?  Can he be looking 
here for Antinous?  One of you should tell him that
the youth is not here, and make him cease from his
madness and folly." 

[17: Antoninus Pius ] 

Thereupon entered a man [27] of temperate character,
I do not say in love affairs but in affairs of state.

When Silenus caught sight of him he exclaimed, 
"Bah! Such fussing about trifles!  This old man seems 
to me the sort of person who would split cumin seed." [28]


[18: Verus - Marcus Aurelius ]
[19: Lucius Verus ] 

Next entered the pair of brothers, Verus [29] and
Lucius. [30] Silenus scowled horribly because he could 
not jeer or scoff at them, expecially not at Verus; 
but he would not ignore his errors of judgement in 
the case of his son [31] and his wife, [32] in that 
he mourned the latter beyond what was becoming, 
especially considering that she was not even a 
virtuous woman; and he failed to see that his son was 
ruining the empire as well as himself, and that 
though Verus had an excellent son-in-law who would 
have administered the state better, and besides 
would have managed the youth better than he could 
manage himself.

But though he refused to ignore these errors he reverenced
the exalted virtue of Verus. His son however he considered
not worth even ridicule and so let him pass.  Indeed he
fell to earth of his own accord because he could not keep 
on his feet or accompany the heroes.

[20: Pertinax ] 

Then Pertinax came in to the banquet still bewailing his
violent end.  But Justice took pity on him and said,

"Nay, the authors of this deed shall not long exult. 
But Pertinax, you too were guilty, since at least so far as
conjecture went you were privy to the plot that was aimed
at the sone of Marcus."

[21: Severus ] 

Next came Severus, a man of excessively harsh temper and
delighting to punish.  "Of him," said Silenus, "I have
nothing to say, for I am terrified by his forbidding and
implacable looks."

[22: Geta ]
[23: Caracalla ]

When his sons would have entered with him, Minos kept them 
at a distance.  However, when he had clearly discerned their
characters, he let the younger [33] pass, but sent away the 
elder [34] to atone for his crimes.


[24: Macrinus ]
[25: Heliogabalus ]

Next Macrinus, assasin and fugitive, and after him the pretty
boy from Emesa [35] were driven far away from the sacred
enclosure.  

[26: Alexander Severus ]

But Alexander the Syrian sat down somewhere in
the lowest ranks and loudly lamented his fate. [36]

Silenus made fun of him and exclaimed, "O fool and madman!
Exalted as you were you could not govern your own family, but
gave your revenues to your mother: [37] nor could you be
persuaded how much better it was to bestow them on your
friends than to hoard them."

"I however, said Justice, "will consign to torment all
who were accessory to his death."  An then the youth was
left in peace.


[27: Valerian ]
[28: Galienus ]

Next entered Gallienus and his father, [38] the latter
still draggin the chains of his captivity, the other
with the dress and languishing gait of a woman.

Seeing Valerian, Silenus cried, "Who is this with the
white plume that leads the army's van? [39]  Then he
greeted Gallienus with, "He who is all decked with gold
and dainty as a maiden." [40]  But Zeus ordered the pair to
depart the feast.

[29: Claudius ]

Next came Claudius, [41] at whom all the gods gazed, and
admiring his greatness of soul granted the empire to
his descendants, since they thought it just that the
posterity of such a lover of his country should rule
as long as possible.  


[30: Aurelian ]

Then Aurelian came rushing in as
though trying to escape from those who would detain him
before the judgement seat of Minos.

For many charges of unjustifiable murders were brought
against him, and he was in flight because he could ill
defend himself against the indictments.  

But my lord Helios [42] 
who had assisted him on other occasions, now
too came to his aid and declared before the gods, "He
has paid the penalty, or have you forgotten the oracle
uttered at Delphi, 'If his punishment match his crime
jutice has been done'?" [43]

[31: Probus ]

With Aurelian entered Probus, who in less than seven
years restored seventy cities and was in many ways a
wise administrator.  Since he had been unjustly
treated by impious men the gods paid him honours,
and moreover exacted the penalty from his assasins.

For all that, Silenus tried to jest at his expense,
though many of the gods urged him to be silent.  In
spite of them he called out, "Now let those that
follow him learn wisdom from his example.  Probus,
do you not know that when physicians give bitter
medicines they mix them with honey? [44]  But you
were always too austere and harsh and never displayed
toleration.  And so your fate, though unjust, was natural
enough.  For no one can govern horses or cattle or mules,
still less men, unless he sometimes yields to them and
gratifies their wishes; just as physicians humour their
patients in trifles so that they may make them obey in
things more essential." 

"What now, little father," exclaimed Dionysus, "have
you turned up as our philosopher?"  

"Why, my son," he replied, "did I not make a philospher 
of you?  Do you not know that Socrates also, who was so like me, [45]
carried off the prized for philosophy from his
contemporaries, at least if you believe that your
brother [46] tells the truth?  So you must allow me to be
serious on occasion and not always jocose."


[32: Carus and his sons ]


While they were talking, Carus and his sons tried to
slip into the banquet, but Justice drove them away.

[33: Diocletian ]
[34: Maximian 1 ] 
[35: Maximian 2 ]
[36: Constantius Chlorus ]  

Next Diocletian advanced in pomp, bringing with him
the two Maximians and my grandfather Constantine. [47]
These latter held one another by the hand and did not
walk alongside of Diocletian, but formed a sort of
chorus round him.  And when they wished to run before 
him as a bodyguard he prevented them, since he did not
think himself entitled to more privileges than they.

But when he realised that he was growing weary he
gave over to them all the burdens that he carried on
his shoulders, and admired their unanimity and
permitted them to sit far in front of many of their
predecessors.  Maximian was so grossly intemperate
that Silenus wasted no jests on him, and he was not
allowed to join the emperors at their feast.

For not only did he indulge in vicious passions of all
sorts, but proved meddlesome and disloyal and often
introduced discord into him without more ado.  So he
went I know not whither, for I forgot to interrogate
Hermes on this point.

However into that harmonious symphony of four there
crept a terribly harsh and discordant strain.  For
this reason Justice would not suffer the two [48] so
much as to approach the door of that assembly of
heroes.  

[36: Licinius ]


As for Licinius, he came as far as the door,
but as his misdeeds were many and monstrous Minos
forthwith drove him away.

[37: Constantine his sons ]

Constantine however entered and sat some time, and
then came his sons. [49] Magnentius [50] was refused
admission because he had never done anything really
laudable, though much that he achieved had the
appearance of merit.  So the gods, who perceived that
these achievements were not based on any virtuous
principle, sent him packing, to his deep chagrin.

When the feast had been prepared as I have
described, the gods lacked nothing, since all
things are theirs.  Then Hermes proposed to examine
the heroes personally and Zeus was of the same mind.

Quirinus thereupon begged that he might summon
one of their number to his side. 

"Quirinus," said Heracles, "I will not have it.  
For why did you not invite to the feast my beloved 
Alexander also? Zeus, if you are minded to introduce 
into our presence any of these Emperors, send, 
I beg of you, for Alexander.  For if we are to 
examined into the merits of men generally, 
who do we not throw open the competition 
to the better man?"


Zeus considerd that what the son of Alcmena said
was only just.  So Alexander joined the company of
heroes, but neither Caesar nor anyone else yielded
his place to him.  However he found and took a
vacant seat which the son [51] of Severus had
taken for himself - he had been expelled for
fratricide.

Then Silenus began to rally Quirinus and said,
"See now whether all these ROmans can match this
one Greek." [52]  

"By Zeus," retorted Quirinus,
"I consider that many of them are as good as he!
It is true that my descendants have admired him so
much that they hold that he alone of all foreign
generals is worthy to be styled 'the Great.'
However, that we shall very soon find out by
examining these men."

Even as he spoke Quirinus was blushing, and was
evidently extremely anxious on behalf of his
descendants and feared that they might come off
with the second prize.

Then Zeus asked the gods whether it would be
better to summon all the Emperors to enter the
lists, or whether they should follow the custom
of athletic contests, which is that he who defeats
the winner of many victories, though he overcome
only that one competitor is held thereby to have
proved himself superior to all who have been
previously defeated, and that too they have not
wrestled with the winner, but only shown themselves
inferior to an antagonist who has been defeated.

All the gods agreed that this was a very suitable
sort of test.  Hermes then summoned Caesar to appear
before them, then octavaian, and thirdly Trajan, as
being the greatest warriors.  

In the silence that
followed, Kronos turned to Zeus and said that he
was astonished to see that only martial Emperors
were summoned to the competition, and not a single
philosopher. "For my part, he added, "I like
philosophers just as well.  So tell Marcus [53] to
come in too."

Accordingly Marcus was summoned and came in looking
excessively dignified and showing the effect of his
studies in the expression of his eyes and his lined
brows.  His aspect was unutterably beautiful from the
very fact that he was careless of his appearance and
unadorned by art; for he wore a very long beard, his
dress was plain and sober, and from lack of nourishment
his body was very shining and transparent, like light
most pure and stainless.

When he too had entered the sacred enclosure, Dionysus
said, "King Kronos and Father Zeus can any incompleteness
exist among the gods?"  And when they replied that it
could not, "Then," said he, "let us bring in here some
votary of pleasure as well."  

"Nay," answered Zeus, "it is not permitted that 
any man should enter here who does not model 
himself on us."  

"In that case, said Dionysus, "let them be tried at 
the entrance.  Let us summon by your leave a man 
not unwarlike but a slave to pleasure and enjoyment.  
Let Constantine come as far as the door."

When this had been agreed upon, opinions were offered
as to the manner in which they were to compete.
Hermes thought that everyone ought to speak for himself
in turn, and then the gods should vote.

But Apollo did not approve of this plan, because he said 
the gods ought to test and examine the truth 
and not plausible rhetoric and the devices of the orator.  

Zeus wished to please them both and at the same time 
to prolong the assembly, so he said, "There is no harm 
in letting then speak if we measure them a small allowance 
of water, [54] and then later on we can cross-examine them
and test the disposition of each one."

Whereupon Silenus said sardonically, "Take care, or
Trajan and Alexander will think it is nectar and drink
up all the water and leave none for the others."  "It was
not my water," retorted Poseidon, "but your vines that
these two were fond of.  So you had better tremble for
your vines rather than for my springs."

Silenus was greatly piquied and had no answer ready, but
thereafter turned his attentin to the disputants.

Then Hermes made this proclamation:

"The trial that begins
Awards to him who wins
The fairest prize to-day.
And lo, the hour is here
And summons you. Appear!
Ye may no more delay.
Come hear the herald's call
Ye pinces one and all.
Many tribes of men
Submissive to you then!
How keen in war your swords!
But now 'tis wisdom's turn;
Now let your rivals learn
How keen can be your words.

Wisdom, thought some, is bliss
Most sure in life's short span;
Others did hold no less
That power to ban or bless
Is happiness for man.
But some set Pleasure high,
Idleness, feasting, love,
All that delights the eye;
Their raiment soft and fine,
Their hands with jewels shine,
Such bliss did they approve.
But whose the victory won
Shall Zeus decide alone.: [55]

While Hermes had been making this proclamation
the lots were being drawn, and it happened that
the first lot favoured Caesar's passion for
being first.  This made him triumphant and
prouder than before.  But the effect on Alexander
was that he almost withdrew from the competition,
had not mighty Heracles encouraged him and
prevented him from leaving.  Alexander drew the 
lot to spak second, but the lots of those who came
next coincided with the order in which they had
lived.  Caesar then began as follows:

Caesar ...

"It was my fortune, O Zeus and ye other gods,
to be born, following a number of great men,
in a city so illustrious that she rules more
subjects than any othr city has ever ruled; and
indeed other cities are well pleased to rank as
second to her. [56]

What other city, I ask, began with three
thousand citizens and in less than six centuries
carried her victorious arms to the ends of the
earth?  What other nations ever produced so many
brave and warlike men or such lawgivers.  What
nation ever honoured the gods as they did.

Observe then that, though i was born in a city so
powerful and so illustrious, my achievements not
only surpassed the men of my own day, but all the
heroes who ever lived.  As for my fellow-citizens
I am confident that there is none who will
challenge my superiority.  But if Alexander here
is is presumptuous, which of his deeds does he
pretend to compare with mine.

His Persian conquests, perhaps, as though he had
never seen all those trophies that I gathered
when I defeated Pompey!  And pary, who was the
more skilful general, Darius or Pompey?

Which of them led the bravest troops?  Pompey
had in his army the most martial of the nations 
formerly subject to Darius, [57] but he reckoned
them no better than Carians, [58] for he led also
those European forces which had often repulsed 
all Asia when she invaded Europe, aye and he had
the bravest of them all, Italians, Illyrians, and
Celts.

And since I have mentioned the Celts, shall we
compare the exploits of Alexander against the 
Getae with my conquest of Gaul?  He crossed the
Danube once, I crossed the Rhine twice.  The
German conquest again is all my doing.  No one
opposed Alexander, but i had to contend against
Ariovistus.  I was the first Roman who ventured
to sail the outer sea. [59]

Perhaps this achievement was not so wonderful,
though it was a daring deed that may well command
your admiration; but a more glorious action of mine 
was when I leapt ashore from my ship before all the
others. [60]  Of the Helvetians and Iberians I say
nothing.  And still I have said not a word about
my campaigns in Gaul, when I conquered more than
three hundred cities and no less than two million
men!

But great as were these achievements of mine, that
which followed was still greater and more daring.
For I had to conted against my fellow citizens
themselves, and to subdue the invincible, the
unconquerable Romans.  Again, if we are judged by
the number of our battles, I fought three times as
many as Alexander, even reckoning by the boasts of
those who embellish his exploits.

If one counts the cities captured, I reduced the
greatest number, not only in Asia but in Europe as
well.  Alexander only visited Egypt as a sight-seer
but I conquered her while I was arranging drinking
-parties.  Are you pleased to inquire which of us
showed more clemency after victory?

I forgave even my enemies, and for what I suffered
in consequence at their hands Justice has taken
vengeance.  But Alexander did not even spare his
friends, much less his enemies. And are you still
capable of disputing the first prize with me?

Then since you will not, like the others, yield
place to me, you compel me to say that whereas I was
humane towards the Helvetians you treated the Thebans
cruelly.  You burned their cities to the ground, but
I restore dthe cities that had been burned by their
own inhabitants.

And indeed it was not at all the same thing to
subdue then thousand Greeks, and to withstand the
onset of a hundred and fifty thousand men.  Much
more could I add both about myself and Alexander,
but I have not had leisure to practise public
speaking.

Wherefore you ought to pardon me, but from what
I have not said, you ought, forming that decision
which equity and justice require, to award me
the first prize."

When Caesar had spoken to this effect he still
wished to go on talking, but Alexander, who had with
difficulty restrained himself hitherto, now lost
patience, and with some agitation and combativeness:

Alexander ...

"But I," said he, "O Jupiter and ye other gods, how
long must I endure in silence the insolence of this man?
There is, as you see, no limit to his praise of himself
or his abuse of me.  It would have better become him
perhaps to refrain from both, since both are alike
insupportable, bu especially from disparaging my conduct,
the more since he imitated it.

But he has arrived at such a pitch of impudence that he
dares to ridicule the model of his own exploits.  Nay,
Caesar, you ought to have remembered those tears you shed
on hearing of the monuments that had been consecrated to
my glorious deeds. [61]  But since then Pompey has inflated
you with pride, Pompey who though he was the idol of his
countrymen was in fact wholly insignificant.

Take his African triumph: that was no grat exploit, but
the feebleness of the consuls in office made it seem
glorious.  Then the famous Servile War [62] was waged
not against men but the vilest of slaves, and its
succesful issue was due to others, I mean Crassus and
Lucius, [63] though Pompey gained the reputation and
the credit for it.

Again, Armenia and the neighbouring provinces were
conquered by Lucullus, [64] yet for these also Pompey
triumphed.  Then he became the idol of the citizens
and they called him 'the Great.'  Greater, I ask, than
whom of his predecessors?  What achievement of his can
be compared with those of Marius [65] or of the two Scipios
or of Furius, [66] who sits over there by Quirinus because
he rebuilt his city when it was almost in ruins?

Those men did not make their reputation at the expense
of others, as happens with public buildings built at
the public expense; I mean that one man lays the
foundation, another finishes the work, while the last
man who is in office though he has only whitewashed
the walls has his name inscribed on the building. [67]

Not thus, I repeat, did those men gain credit for the
deeds of others.  They were themselves the creators
and artificers of their schemes and deserved their
illustrious titles.  Well then, it is no wonder that
you vanquished Pompey, who used to scratch his head
with finger-tip [68] and in all respects was more of a
fox than a lion.

When he was deserted by Fortune who had so long
favoured him, you easily overcame him, thus unaided.
And it is evident that it was not to any superior
ability of yours that you owed your victory, since
after running short of provisions [69] no small blunder
for a general to make, as I need not tell you - fought
a battle and were beaten.

And if from imprudence or lack of judgement or inability
to control his countrymen Pompey neither postponed a
battle when it was his interest to protract the war,
nor followed up a victory when he had won, [70] it was 
due to his own errors that he failed, and not your strategy.

The Persians, on the contrary, though on all occasions they 
were well and wisely equipped, had to submit to my valour.
And since it becomes a virtuous man and a king to pride
himself not merely on his exploits but also on the justice 
of those exploits, it was on behalf of the Greeks that I
took vengeance on the Persians, and when I made war on the
Greeks it was not because I wished to injure Greece, but
only to chastise those who tried to prevent me from
marching through and from calling the Persians to account.

You, however, while you subdued the Germans and Gauls
were preparing to fight against your fatherland.  What
could be worse or more infamous. And since you have alluded
as though insultingly to 'ten thousand Greeks,' I am aware
that you Romans are yourselves descended from the Greeks,
and that the greater part of Italy was colonised by Greeks;
however on that fact I do not insist.

But at any rate did not you Romans think it very important
to have as friends and allies one insignificant tribe of
those very Greeks, I mean the Aetolians, my neighbours?

And later, when you had gone to war with them for whatever
reason, did you not have great trouble in making them obey
you?  Well then, if in the old age, as one may say, of
Greece, you were barely able to reduce not the whole nation
but an insignificant state which was hardly heard of when
Greece was in her prime, what would have happened to you
if you had had to contend against the Greeks when they
were in full vigour and united?

You know how cowed you were when Pyrrhus crossed to
invade you.  And if you think the conquest of Persia such
a trifle and disparage an achievement so glorious, tell me
why, after a war of more than three hundred years, you 
Romans have never conquered a small province beyond the
Tigris which is still governed by the Parthians?

Shall I tell you why?  It was the arrows of the Persians
that checked you.  Ask Antony to give you an account of
them, since he was trained for war by you.  I, on the 
other hand, in less than ten years conquered not only 
Persia but India too.

After that do you dare to dispute the prize with me,
who from childhood have commanded armies, whose exploits
have geen so glorious that the memory of them - though 
they have not been worthily recounted by historians -
will nevertheless live for ever, like those of the
Invincible Hero, [71] my king, whose follower I was,
on whom I modelled myself?

Achilles my ancestor I strove to rival, but Heracles
I ever admired and followed, so far as a mere man may
follow in the footsteps of a god.  "Thus much, ye gods,
I was bound to say in my own defence against this man;
though indeed it would have been better to ignore him.

And if some things I did seemed cruel, I never was so
the innocent, but only to those who had often and in
many ways thwarted me and had made no proper or fitting
use of their opportunities.  And even my offences 
against these, which were due to the emergency of the
time, were followed by Remorse, that very wise and
divine preserver of men who have erred.

As for those whose ambition it was to show their 
enmity continually and to thwart me, I considered 
that I was justified in chastising them.'

When Alexander in his turn had made his speech in
martial fashion, Poseidon's attendant carried the
water-clock to Octavian, but gave him a smaller
allowance of water, partly because time was precious,
but still more because he bore him a grudge for the
disrespect he had shown to the god. [72]

Octavian ...

Octavian with his usual sagacity understood this,
so without stopping to say anything that did not 
concern himself, he began:  "For my part, Zeus and 
ye other gods, I shall not stay to disparage and
belittle the actions of others, but shall speak
only of what concerns myself.  Like the noble
Alexander here I was but a youth when I was called
to govern my country. 

Like Caesar yonder, my father, [73] I conducted
successful campaigns against the Germans.  When I
became involved in civil dissensions I conquered
Egypt in a sea-fight off Actium; I defeated Brutus
and Cassius at Philippi: the defeat of Sextus,
Pompey's son, was a mere incident in my campaign.

I showed myself so gentle to the guidance of
philosophy that I even put up with the plain
speaking of Athenodorus, [74] and instead of 
resenting it i was delighted with it and revered 
the man as my preceptor, or rather as though he
were my own father.

Areius [75] I couned my friend and close companion,
and in short I was never guilty of any offence against
philosophy.  But since I saw that more than once Rome
had been brought to the verge of ruin by internal
quarrels, I so administered her affairs as to make her
stong as adamant for all time, unless indeed, O ye
gods, you will otherwise.  For I did not give way to
boudless ambition and aim at enlarging her empire at
all costs, but ssigned for it two boundaries defined
as it were by nature herself, the Danube and the Euphrates.

Then after conquering the Scythians and Thracians I
did not employ the long reign that you gods vouchsafed
me in making projects for war after war, but devoted
my leisure to legislation and to reforming the evils
that war had caused.

For in this I though that I was no less well advised
than my predecessors, or rather, if I may make bold
to say so, I was better advised than any who have ever
administered so great an empire.   For some of these,
when they might have remained quiet and not taken the
field, kept making one war an excuse for the next,
like quarrelsome people and their lawsuits; and so
they perished in their campaigns.



Others when they had a war on their hands gave
themselves up to indulgence, and preferred such
base indulgence not only to future glory but even
to their personal safety.  When I reflect on all
this I do not think myself entitled to the lowest
place.  But whatever shall seem good to you, O ye
gods, it surely becomes me to accept with a good grace."

Trajan ...

Trajan was allowed to speak next.  Though he had some
talent for oratory he was so lazy that he had been in 
the habit of letting Sura write most of his speeches
for him; so he shouted rather than spoke, and meanwhile,
displayed to the gods his Getic and Parthian trophies,
while he accused his old age of not having allowed him 
to extend his Parthian conqusts.

"You cannot take us in," said Silenus; "you reigned
twenty years and Alexander here only twelve.  Why then
do you not put it down to your own love of ease,
instead of complaining of your short allowance of time?"

Stung by the taunt, since he was not deficient in
eliquence, though intemperance often made him seem more
stupid than he was, Trajan began again.  "O Zeus and 
ye other gods, when I took over the empire it was in
a sort of lethargy and much disordered by the tyranny
that had long prevailed at home, and by the insolent
conduct of the Getae.

I alone ventured to attack the tribes beyond the
Danube, and I subdued the Getae, the most warlike
race that ever existed, which is due partly to their
physical courage, partly to the doctrines that they
have adopted from their admired Zamolxis. [76]

For they believe that they do not die but only
change their place of abode, and they meet death
more readily than other men undertake a journey.
Yet I accomplished that task in a matter of five
years or so.

That of all the Emperors who came before me [77]
I was regarded as the mildest in the treatment of
my subjects, is I imagine, obvious, and neither
Caesar here nor any other will dispute it with me.

Against the Parthians I thought I ought not to
employ force until they had put themselves in the 
wrong, but when they did so I marched against them,
undeterred by my age, though the laws would have
allowed me to quit the service.

Since then the facts are as I have said, do I not
deserve to be honoured before all the rest, first
because I was so mild to my subjects, secondly
because more than othes I inspired terror in my
country's foes, thirdly because I revered your
daughter divine Phiosophy?"

When Trajan had finished this speech the gods
decided that he excelled all the rest in clemency;
and evidently this was a virtue peculiarly pleasing
to them.

Marcus Aurelius ...

When Marcus Aurelius began to speak, Silenus whispered
to Dionysus, "Let us hear which one of his paradoxes
and wonderful doctrines this Stoic will produce."

But Marcus turned to Zeus and the other gods and said,
"It seems to me, O Zeus and ye other gods, that I have 
no need to make a speech or compete.  If you did not
know all that concerns me it would indeed be fitting
for me to inform you. But since you know it and nothing
at all is hidden from you, do you of your own accord
assign me such honour as I deserve.

Thus Marcus showed that admirable as he was in other
respects he was wise also beyond the rest, because he
knew "When it is time to speak and when to be silent."[78]

Constantine ...

Constantine was allowed to speak next.  On first
entering the lists he was confident enough.  But when
he reflected on the exploits of the others he saw that
his own were wholly trivial. He had defeated two tyrants,
but, to tell the truth, one of them [79] was untrained 
in war and effeminate, the other [80] a poor creature
and enfeebled by old age, while both were alike odious
to gods and men.

Moreover his campaigns against the barbarians covered
him with ridicule.  For he paid them tribute, so to
speak, while he gave all his attention to Pleasure,
who stood at a distance from the gods near the entrance
to the moon.  Of her indeed he was so enamoured that
he had no eyes for anything else, and cared not at all
for victory.  However, as it was his turn and had to
say something, he began:

"In the following respects I am superior to these
others; to the Macedonian in having fought against 
Romans, Germans and Scythians, instead of Asiatic
barbarians; to Caesar and Octavian in that I did not,
like them, lead a revolution against brave and good
citizens, but attacked only the most cruel and wicked
tyrants.

As for Trajan, I should naturally rank higher on
account of those same glorious exploits against the
tyrants, while it would be only fair to regard me as
his equal on the score of that territory which he
added to the empire, and I recovered; if indeed it
be not more glorious to regain than to gain.

As for Marcus here, by saying nothing for himself he
yields precedency to all of us." 

"But Constantine," said Silenus, "are you not offering 
us mere gardens of Adonis [81] as exploits?"

"What do you mean," he asked, "by gardens of Adonis"?

"I mean", said Silenus, "those that women plant in pots,
in honour of the lover of Aphrodite, by scraping together
a little earth for a garden bed. They bloom for a little
space and fade forthwith."

At this Constantine blushed, for he realised
that this was exactly his own performance.

Silence was then proclaimed, and the Emperors
thought they had only to wait till the gods decided
to whom they would vote the first prize. But the 
latter agreed that they must bring to light the
motives that had governed each, and not judge them
by their actions alone, since Fortune had the greatest 
share in these.

That goddess herself was standing near and kept
reproaching all of them, with the single exception
of Octavian; he, she said, had always been grateful
to her.  Accordingly the gods decided to entrust
this enquiry also to Hermes, and he was told to
begin with Alexander and to ask him what he considered
the finest of all things, and what had been his object
in doing and suffering all that he had done and suffered.

Alexander the Great ...

"To conquer the world," he replied. "Well," asked
Hermes, "do you think you accomplished this? 
"I do indeed," said Alexander.

Whereupon Silenus with a malicious laugh exclaimed,
"But you were often conquered yourself by my daughters!"
by which he meant his vines, alluding to Alexander's 
love of wine and intemperate habits.  But Alexander
was well stocked with Peripatetic subterfuges, and
retorted, "Inanimate things cannot conquer; nor do
we contend with such, but only with the whole race
of men and beasts."

"Ah," said Silenus, "behold the chicancry of logic!
But tell me in which class you place yourself, the
inanimate or the animate and living?"  At this he 
seemed mortified and said, "Hush!  Such was my
greatness of soul that I was convinced that I should
become, or rather that I was already, a god."

"At any rate," said Silenus, "you were often defeated
by yourself."  "Nay," retorted Alexander, "to conquer
onself or be defeated by onself amounts to the same
thing.  i was talking of my victories over other men."

"No more of your logic!" cried Silenus, "how adroitly
you detect my sophisms!  But when you were wounded in
India, [82] and Peucestes [83] lay near you and they
carried you out of the town at your last gasp, were
you defeated by him who wounded you, or did you 
conquer him?"  "I conquered him, and what is more
I sacked the town as well."

"Not you indeed, you immortal," said Silenus,
"for you were lying like Homer's Hector in a swoon
and at your last gasp.  It was your soldiers who fought
and conquered."  "Well but I led them," said Alexander.
"How so?  When you were being carried away almost dead?"

And then Silenus recited the passage in Euripides [84]
beginning "Alas how unjust is the custom of the Greeks,
when an army triumphs over the enemy -"  But Dionysus 
interrupted him saying "Stop, little father, say no more,
or he will treat you as he treated Cleitus."  At that
Alexander blushed, his eyes became suffused with tears
and he said no more.  Thus their conversation ended.

Caesar ...

Next Hermes began to question Caesar, and said, "And
you, Caesar, what was the end and aim of your life?"
"To hold the first place in my own country," he 
replied, "and neither to be nor to be thought second
to any man."

"This," said Hermes, "is not quite clear.  Tell me,
was it in wisdom that you wished to be first, or in
oratorical skill, or in military science, or the 
science of government?"

"I should have liked well," said Caesar, "to be first
of all men in all of these; but as I could not attain
to that, I sought to become the most powerful of my
fellow-citizens."  "And did you become so very
powerful?" asked Silenus.  "Certainly," he replied,
"since I made myself their master."

"Yes that you were able to do; but you could not make
yourself beloved by them, though you played the
philanthropic role as though you were acting in a 
stageplay, and flattered them all shamefully."
"What!" cried Caesar, "I not beloved by the people?
When they punished Brutus and Cassius!"

"That was not for murdering you," replied Silenus,
"since for that they elected them consuls! [85]
 No, it was because of the money you left them.
When they had heard your will read they perceived 
what a fine reward was offered them in it for such
resentment of your murder."

Octavian ...

When this dialogue ended, Hermes next accosted
Octavian.  "Now for you," he said, "will you
please tell us what you thought the finest thing
in the world?" "To govern well," he replied.
"You must say what you mean by 'well,' Augustus.
Govern well!  The wickedest tyrants claim to do that.

Even Dionysius, [86] I suppose, thought that he 
governed well, and so did Agathocles [87] who was
a still greater criminal."  "But you know, O ye
gods," said Octavian, "that when I parted with
my grandson [88] I prayed you to give him the
courage of Caesar, the cleverness of Pompey,
and my own good fortune."

"What a many things," cried Silenus, "that do need
really saving gods have been jumbled together by
this doll-maker!"  "Why pray do you give me that
ridiculous name?" asked the other.  "Why," he
replied, "just as they model nymphs did you not
model gods, [89] Augustus, and first and foremost
Caesar here?" At this Octavian seemed abashed and
said no more.

Trajan ...

Then Hermes addressing Trajan said, "Now you tell
us what was the principle that guided all your
actions?"  "My aims," he replied, "were the same 
as Alexander's but I acted with more prudence."
"Nay," said Silenus, "you were the slave of more
ignoble passions.  Anger was nearly always his
weak point, but yours was pleasure of the vilest
and most infamous sort."

"Plague take you?" exclaimed Dionysus, "You keep
railing at them all and you don't let them say a
word for themselves.  However, in their case there 
was some ground for your sarcasms, but now consider
well what you can find to criticise in Marcus.
For in my opinion he is a man, to quote Simonides,
'four-square and made without a flaw.'" [90]

Marcus Aurelius ...

Then Hermes addressed Marcus and said, "and you,
Verus, what did you think the noblest ambition in
life?"  In a low voice he answered modestly,
"To imitate the gods."  This answer they at once 
agreed was highly noble and in fact the best
possible.  And even Hermes did not wish to
cross-examine him further, since he was convinced
that Marcus would answer every question equally well.

The other gods were of the same mind; only Silenus
cried "By Dionysus I shall not let this sophist off
so easily.  Why then did you eat bread and drink wine
and not ambrosia and nectar like us?"  "Nay," he
replied "it was not in the fashion of my meat and
drink that I thought to imitate the gods.  But I
nourished my body because I believed, though perhaps
falsely, that even your bodies require to be
nourished by the fumes of sacrifice.  Not that I
supposed I ought to imitate you in that respect,
but rather your minds."

For the moment Silenus was at a loss as though he
had been hit by a good boxer, [91] then he said: "There 
is perhaps something in what you say; but now tell
me what did you think was really meant by 'imitating
the gods.'"

"Having the fewest possible needs, and doing good
to the greatest possible number."

"Do you mean to say", he asked, "that you had no
needs at all?"

"I", said Marcus, "had none, but 
my wretched body had a few perhaps."

Since in this also Marcus seemed to have answered 
wisely, Silenus was at a loss, but finally fastened
on what he thought was foolish and unreasonable in
the Emperor's behaviour to his son and wife, I mean
in enrolling the latter among the deified and entrusting
the empire to the former.

"But in that also," said the other, "I did but imitate
the gods. I adopted the maxim of Homer when he says 
'the good and prudent man loves and cherishes his own
wife', [92] while as to my son I can quote the excuse of
Zeus himself when he is rebuking Ares: 'Long ago,' he says,
'I should have smitten thee with a thunderbolt, had I not
loved thee because thou art my son.' [93] Besides, I never 
thought my son would prove so wicked. Youth ever vascillates
between the extremes of vice and virtue, and if in the end
he inclined to vice, still he was not vicious when I
entrusted the empire to him; it was only after receiving
it that he became corrupted. Therefore my behaviour to
my wife was modelled on that of the divine Archilles,
and that to my son was in imitation of the supreme Zeus.
Moreover, in neither case did I introduce any novelty.
It is the custom to hand down the succession to a man's
sons, and all men desire to do so; as for my wife I was
not the first to decree divine honours to a wife, for I
followed the example of many others.  It is perhaps
absurd to have introduced any such custom, but it would
be almost an injustice to deprive one's nearest and 
dearest of what is now long established. However, I
forget myself when I make this lengthy explanation to
you, O Zeus and ye other gods; for ye know all things.
Forgive me this forwardness."

Constantine ...

When Marcus had finished his speech, Hermes asked
Constantine, "And what was the height of your 
ambition?"

"To amass great wealth," he answered, "and then to 
spend it liberally so as to gratify my own desires
and the desires of my friends."

At this Silenus burst into a loud laugh, and said,
"If it was a banker that you wanted to be, how did
you so far forget yourself as to lead the life of a
pastrycook and hairdresser? Your locks and your fair
favour [94] betokened this all along, but what you say
about your motives convicts you."  

Thus did Silenus sharply reprove Constantine.

The silence was proclaimed and the gods cast a
secret ballot. It turned out that Marcus had most
of the votes. After conferring apart with his father, [95]
Zeus bade Hermes make a proclamation as follows:

"Know all ye mortals who have entered this contest,
that according to our laws and decrees the victor is
allowed to exult but the vanquished must not complain.
Depart then wherever you please, and in future live
every one of you under the guidance of the gods.
Let every man choose his own guardian and guide."

After this announcement, Alexander hastened to Heracles,
and Octavian to Apollo, but Marcus attached himself 
closely to Zeus and Kronos.  Caesar wandered about
for a long time and ran hother and thither, till mighty
Ares and Aphrodite took pity on him and summoned him
to them. Trajan hastened to Alexander and sat down near
him. 

As for Constantine, he could not discover among the gods
the model of his own career, but when he caught sight of
Pleasure, who was not far off, he ran to her.  She received
him tenderly and embraced him, then after dressing him in
raiment of many colours and otherwise making him beautiful,
she led him away to Incontinence.

There too he found Jesus, who had taken up his abode with
her and cried aloud to all comers: 

"He that is a seducer, he that is a murderer, 
he that is sacrilegious and infamous, 
let him approach without fear! 
For with this water will I wash him 
and will straightway make him clean.

And though he should be guilty 
of those same sins a second time, 
let him but smite his breast and beat his head 
and I will make him clean again."

To him Constantine came gladly, when he had conducted his 
sons forth from the assembly of the gods.  But the avenging
deities none the less punished both him and them for their
impiety, and extracted the penalty for the shedding of the
blood of their kindred, [96] until Zeus granted them a respite
for the sake of Claudius and Constantius. [97]

"As for thee", Hermes said to me, "I have granted
you the knowledge of thy father Mithras. Do thou keep
his commandments, and thus secure for thyself a cable
and sure anchorage throughout thy life, and when thou
must depart from the world that canst with good hopes
adopt him as thy guardian god."

[1] Better known by its Latin name Saturnalia.
    Saturn is the Greek Kronos.
[2] i.e. not a fable with a moral nor an animal fable.
[3] cf. Plato, Phaedrus 247 B
[4] Odyssey 6.42
[5] cf. Oration 4.149 B, 154 B
[6] cf. Martial 8,51.5 - it is often uncertain whether electron
    means amber, or a combination of gold and silver.
[7] This is not in our Homer, but Julian may have in mind Iliad 11.76
[8] Silenus is usually represented as bald.
[9] Suetonius, Augustus 16.
[10] The Stoic philosopher.
[11] Julian probably alludes to the influence on Augustus of
     Athenodorus the Stoic.
[12] A deity among the Thracians, who according to one tradition
     had been a slave of Pythagoras; cf. Heroditus 4.94; Plato
     Charmides 156; Julian 8:244 A
[13] cf. Plato, Gorgias 525 D,E; Republic 611 C, Tacitus Annals 6.6;
     Lucian, Cataplus 27
[14] Odyssey 16.181
[15] ie. Seleucus; cf. Suetonius, Tiberius 56,70.
[16] Suetonius, Tiberius 60
[17] Caligula
[18] Knights 1111 foll
[19] Their riches were proverbial, cf. Juvenal 1.100; 14.32
[20] Tacitus, Annals 11.12; Juvenal 10.330
[21] An allusion partly to the smoke of civil way, partly to the
     burning of the temple of Jupiter Capitoline under Vitellius;
     the temple restored by Vespasian; Tacitas, Annals 4.81
[22] Titus
[23] Domitan
[24] Phalaris of Agrigentum
[25] Nerva
[26] Hadrian
[27] Antonius Pius
[28] A proverb for niggardliness; cf. Theocritus 10.50
[29] Verus was the family name of Marcus Aurelius.
[30] Lucius Verus
[31] Commodus
[32] Faustina
[33] Geta
[34] Caracalla
[35] Heliogabalas; cf. Oration 4.150
[36] Alexander Severus was assinated in 235 CE
[37] Mammaea
[38] Valerian died in captivity among the Persians.
[39] Eureipides, Phoenissae 120
[40] Slightly altered from Illiad 2.872
[41] cf. Oration 1.6 D
[42] cf. Oration 4.155 B
[43] An oracular verse ascribed to Rhadamanthus by Aristotle,
     Nic Ethics 5.5.3; attributed to Hesiod, Fragments 150
     Goettling; it became a proverb.
[44] Plato, Laws 659 E; a rhetorical comonplace; Themistius 63 B
[45] cf. Plato, Symposium 215; cf Julian, Oration 6,187 A
[46] A reference to the oracle of Apollo which declared that 
     Socrates was the wisest man of his times.
[47] cf. Oration 1,7 A,B
[48] ie: the two Maximians, the colleagues of Diocletian.
[49] Constantine II, Constans and Constantius
[50] cf. Oration 1.31,33 foll
[51] Caracalla
[52] Cf. Plato, Laws 730 D; Julian, Misopogon 353 D
[53] Marcus Aurelius
[54] A reference to the water-clock, elepsydra
[55] In this doggeral made up of tags oanapaestic verse, Julian
     reproduces in the first five and last two verses the 
     proclamation made at the Olympic games. The first three
     verses occur in Lucian, Demonax 65.
[56] Cf. Oration 1.8 C
[57] Darius III
[58] Cf. Oration 2.56 C
[59] The "inner" sea was the Mediterranean.
[60] Caesar, De Bello Gallico 4.25, ascribes this to the standard
     bearer of the tenth legion.
[61] At Gades, on seeing a statue of Alexander; cf. Suetonius, JC 7
[62] Led by Spartacus 73-71 BCE; Appian, Civil Wars I, 116-120
[63] Lucius Gellius; Plutarch, Crassus
[64] Lucinius Lucullus the conqueror of Mithridates.
[65] Caius Marius the rival of Sulla
[66] Furius Camillus repulsed the Gauls 390 BCE; cf Oration 1.29 D
[67] Cf. Letter to Themistius, 267 B
[68] A proverb for effeminancy; cf. Plutarch, Pompeius 48; Juvenal
     9.133; Lucian, The Rhetorician's Guide II.
[69] At Dyrrhachium; Plutarch, Julius Caesar
[70] An echo of Plutarch, Apophthegmata 206 D
[71] Heracles
[72] Suetonius, Augustus 16; during the campaign against Pompei when
     the fleet of Augustus was lost in a storm, he swore he would win
     in spite of Neptune.
[73] Augustus was Julius Caesar's nephew, and his son only by adoption.
[74] A Stoic philosopher; cf. pseudo-Lucian, Long Lives 21.23;
     Suetonius, Augustus; Dio Chrysostom 33.48
[75] Letter 51.434 A; Letter to Themistius 265 C; Themistius 63 D
[76] Cf. 306 C, Oration 8.244 A and note
[77] For this idiom cf. Milton, Paradise Lost 4:324
[78] Euripedes, fr.417 Nauck
[79] Maxentius
[80] Licinius
[81] A proverb for whatever perished quickly; cf. Theocritus 15; also
     Frazer, Attis, Adonis and Osiris, p.194
[82] At the storming of the capital of the Mallians, probably the modern
     city of Multan, in 326 BCE, cf. Plutarch, Alexander; Lucian, Diologues
     of the Dead 14.
[83] Peucestes was wounded but saved Alexander's life; Pliny 34.8
[84] Andomache 693 foll: the passage continues "Tis not those who 
     did the work that gain the credit but the general wins all
     the glory." Cleitus was killed by Alexander at a banquet for
     quoting these verses.
[85] This is not according to history. The senate gave Brutus and Cassius
     proconsul power in their provinces.
[86] Tyrant of Syracuse 405-367 BCE
[87] Tyrant of Syracuse 317-289 BCE
[88] Caius Caesar
[89] Julian refers to the custom of deifying the Emperors.
[90] Simonides fr. 5 Bergk
[91] Plato, Protagoras 339 E
[92] Iliad 9.343
[93] A paraphrase of Iliad 5.897.
[94] Iliad 3.55
[95] Kronos
[96] Introduction to Volume I, p.7
[97] Constantius Chlorus.

THE CAESARS

By Wilmer Cave WRIGHT, PH.D.


The Caesars, otherwise entitled in the MSS. 
Symposium or Kronia (Latin Saturnalia) was written 
at Constantinople in 361 and was probably addressed
to Sallust, to whom Julian had sent his lost
work the Kronia. [1] The interlocutor in the 
proemium [2] is almost certainly Sallust.

"Caesar" was in Julian's time a Roman Emperor's
most splendid title, and was regularly used by the
barbarians when they referred to the Emperor.
The idea and the working out of the satire is
Lucianic and there are echoes here and there of
Lucian's Dialogues of the Dead, but Julian is
neither so witty nor so frivolous as Lucian. In
speaking of the gods he allows himself a licence
which is appropriate to the festival, but would
otherwise seem inconsistent  with the admonitions
addressed to priests in the Fragment of a Letter.
His conception of the State and of the ideal ruler
is Greek rather than Roman. 


FOOTNOTES:

[1] Cf. Oration 4.157 C
[2] 306 A

• Julian's Treatise Against the Galilaeans.
• A thesis: Did Constantine INVENT Christianity?

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